The view from c6

December 31, 2011

2011-12-31T15:04:00.003-05:00

Tonight for New Year's Eve we're going to Humble Pie followed by going to see Morning After at Southland Ballroom. Seems like an appropriate band to see or at least their name is appropriate for this day.

I wasn't real impressed with 2011. There were some real highlights but all in all I'm looking forward to a big improvement in 2012 starting tomorrow.

If 2011 had a face my boy Kim's face would be it.

Today's phrase is intestinal fortitude.

2011-06-05T17:52:00.002-04:00

Today was our company picnic. Working for Poi, as stated before, can be a challenge on a personal level. Friday she said her new man would be at the company picnic so of course I said I sure wouldn't be there.
I mean who would?

One thing positive about this period, I have gotten much stronger internally. I have been knocked down so many times over the past few years and more so the past 7 months and I keep getting up. Yesterday I got to thinking that seeing POI's kids A&R would be more than worth the yuck of seeing POI and her man together. I wanted to take control and if I am as strong as I think I have become, than I could go today. I wanted to show A&R that they will always be a huge part of my head and heart. I could only do that by going to the picnic. I know they know but reinforcement is a good thing.

So I went and am so glad I did. One of POI's best friends was there as well, which was a real bonus. She's been a really good friend through this business. She's very loyal to POI and doesn't share everything but she has remained a wonderful friend. A&R's reception was tempered but nice. They didn't know I was going to be there. They also have loyalty for their mother. Those are two of the coolest best spirited kids ever. Ever! They're in my DNA. I love'em. POI has ended my communications with AorR but I did tell A that when I "like" his posts on FB I was saying hi. He said he knew.

So after an hour it was time to move. "A" and I had a few final laughs as he walked me to my car. I can go to bed knowing I did the right thing. I feel really good about going.

Well that didn't last long.

2011-06-03T09:37:00.002-04:00

I decided to stay on Match for one more month...really. I did take about two weeks off. The problem with that was that excessive thinking returned. I even misinterpreted POI's friendly personable conversations recently as a sign of renewed interest. I was very wrong.

Match, if nothing else is an interesting diversion and a rather surreal ego boost. This morning I got a message from a 61 year old woman from Statesville, NC. That's like 150 mils away. Why?

Tomorrow is Spiritedgal6 from Chapel Hill. She is a research scientist for a pharmaceutical company. I'm looking forward to it. I have avoided women from Wake Forest where POI lives. I no longer shy away from Wake Forest and have been in touch with a couple of women there.

Match is way more time consuming than the past two times. I was crazy lucky. I'm going to try to be more open than I've been of late and get my head into this social exercise and finally move on.

Situational friends, friends and true friends

2011-05-29T09:56:00.005-04:00

I've been interested in the dynamics of friendships for some time. There is no real purpose to categorizing friendships other than as a writing exercise.

I've been thinking about this hierarchy of friendship lately because I have spoken to a few friends recently that I haven't spoken to in some time. I couldn't say all these folks are true friends but they are good friends. I was interested in see what type of relationship would evolve from poi's cul-d-sac friends/neighbors. After poi broke up I told her that I didn't expect to hear from any of the cul-d-sac people because though they had been friends for 5 years they were going to be situational friends because they weren't going to call or invite me over for a cookout or to watch a game on tv. Poi disagreed. I have found in the past 2 weeks I haven't been forgotten by at least two of the Cul-d-sackers. I wondered if I was missed by people I had gotten to know over the years. The past 2 weeks I have found that I am missed and that they want to get together. Little things like being told that you're missed is a reaffirming thing to hear and elevates a person from a situational friend to a friend.

This is all bull shit gibberish. It's the kind of thinking that has no value but it's the kind of thinking that goes on in my head once in a while. I mean someone who is considered a true friend can fall off the map while a person that may be considered a situational friend could step up and surprise you. Poi was a true friend for a long time and now I'm not sure she fits any of the categories. She has broken up many times, a friend wouldn't do that but she had been there so many times during good times and tough times that she was true friend.

Ultimately you're a very fortunate soul if you have friends no matter what. If you're lucky enough to have a true friend or two than you have a real gift. Let them know once in a while how much you appreciate them. They know you do but it's really good to hear.

The person that deserves me, I don't deserve, yet.

2011-05-26T22:34:00.002-04:00

If money could be made by just thinking, I'd be rich. I have wasted soooooo much time thinking about things I have no control over. I would certainly be an Olympic medalist in the Over Thinking event. Unfortunately contrary to what you may have heard there isn't money in thinking about things that have no basis in reality.
Sadly I don't have the ability to turn on and off my brain.

I've reached a decision, I'm going to take a break from Match. I can't give the masses what the crave :) in my current state. Currently if the "right" one came along I'm not sure I would recognize or act on it. I need to clear the toxins that have been floating in my spirit for way too long before I'm really ready to start again. It's the right decision for me and my future POI.

It's hot already.

2011-05-24T21:47:00.002-04:00

90 degrees two days in a row. No one asked but I'm not ready for this heat/humidity thing.

Tomorrow is payday here in c6. Breathing has been fully restored. Professionally speaking things are pretty darn good right now. Tomorrow's check will reflect that. Also communication with poi professionally has been terrific lately, however celebrating this big accomplishment together, well I do get a check. Seems sort of empty if I may speak the truth.

Speaking of hot, last week I had three dates with three very fine women. This week I cut it back to one. Frankly unless I have a spreadsheet with profiles and emails sent, I don't remember who they are. Actually the problem is I need to step up my care level. I'm not sure what letter game I've brought to these dates but it hasn't been very high. My Match renewal in next week, I'm going to recalibrate and give it another go.

I was wondering...

2011-05-22T12:35:00.002-04:00

...how many people from China come to the U.S. to adopt an American baby?

...if anyone I know has ever bought anything from Sky Mall?

...if homeless people know that standing all day in the sun holding up a sign that reads "will work for food" is harder than actually working? I guess holding a sign isn't a real transferable skill.

...what probiotics were good for?

...if every house made today in the U.S. has an open floor plan, granite counter tops in the kitchen, double sinks in the master bathroom, stainless appliances and that's great for entertaining? You could make a drinking game out of any real estate show on HGTV. Granite counter top, take a drink. Great for entertaining, take a drink. You'll be hammered by the end of a single episode.

...what the heck I'm doing inside when it's so beautiful outside? Artsplosure is today! I think I'll walk to it and soak up some sun.

Dating advice from Pud

2011-05-21T08:27:00.003-04:00

Last night I met my old pal Pud at Humble Pie for a drink. Humble Pie has a great outside bar and 2 Hearted Ale is only $3.50. I haven't been out with just Pud and I in really long time.

Pud has been separated for nearly a year but didn't start dating until maybe 5 months ago. He felt with all of the wisdom he has gained in the last 5 months he need to share. Imagine listening to dating advice from George Costanza and you get the idea of pearls that would come forward.

The main thing is "Just be normal and don't be a dick" and you're in.
That's it. According to Pud women in their 40's-50's on Match are so use to men that lie and are basically dicks that if you're nice and "normal" you really stand out.

While he's sharing his knowledge of the needs and wants of women he's looking at every woman there and giving editorial comments about each.

Pud has been dating a few people. They must be thin and physically fit. Unfortunately one of the women he's dating needs to drop another 9 lbs or she risks get cut. When I asked him if he was acting contrary to his advice against acting like a dick, he said no, that he was working hard to stay in shape and expects his ladies to do the same. Asking again how that requirement wasn't dickish he didn't see it that way so it wasn't dickish.
I guess there's situational dickishness that's acceptable.

I was thankful for Pud taking the time to help me navigate the dating world but I think I've got it from here.

I'm glad I go out even though I got a $30 parking ticket. I just wanted a beer or two. I didn't order a ticket. I've been in such a good mood lately that the ticket is just a ticket. No big whoop.

Harvard Educated Educational Consultant from Chapel Hill

2011-05-18T21:28:00.002-04:00

Two geographically undesirable women in a row. Both fine people. They were on opposite ends of the educational spectrum. One went to three different colleges and still graduated in 4 years. She had her first Masters by the age of 20. The other person had a hard time getting out of high school. Both wrote clever profiles but their locations are deal breakers. If there was real chemistry, location wouldn't carry as much weight. Both dates ended with the obligatory three pat hug. You can't fake chemistry or at least I can't.

On this Match trip I've asked the Dated Ones what their match experience has been like. Apparently a lot of men lie about their age and speak openly about their hankering for sex. Oh and a lot of men aren't as slim as they profess on their profile.

My membership is up for renewal the end of next week. I'm just not feeling this whole exercise. However other than the grocery store and running my exposure to women is very limited. I could take a break. I may do that.

Menapous and the First Date

2011-05-17T20:47:00.003-04:00

Tonight was Ann from Clayton. Yes Clayton of Johnson County. I'll take Wake Forest over Clayton any time upon reflection. Johnson county is an odd place. It's a booming community with pharmaceutical companies and red necks. Ann at 52 is the oldest person I have ever gone out with... 518 was the agreed upon location. 518 wasn't as busy as it once was though it's always been one of my favorites. After the first round of drinks and before the tasty Calamari Ann started fanning herself with vim and vigor. She was getting hot flashes. Not that there was a buzz to kill but if there was it would be killed. She could focus on nothing else. This went on for maybe 10 minutes. I couldn't find anything in the Match.com Worst Case Scenario handbook on what to say or do.

This Match thing is a nice ego boost and if desired I could go out every night. One of the things I've noticed is that there are a lot of desperate people out there. I don't know these people and yet they're saying all sort of desperate sounding things. I sure wouldn't say the things that are being said.

64 months ago I went out on a perfect date. It's to date the best date I have ever been on. From the first to last second it was great. Fun, laughter a real connection and topped off with great sex. There was chemestry and fireworks! It was a date for the ages. I know that date was one that comes along once in a life time but Can another even come close? I need to let the past go and start a new memory a new best date ever. Frankly that's silly talk, your past will always influence your present. The trick is is to learn that the present may not have anything to do with the past. There's comfort in the past and it's what we retreat to when stressed. After a date like tonight I want to retreat to my past to my best date ever. The problem is is that that reality too is in the past so how can I move on if I base every date, every person on the best date ever?

My Black friend

2011-05-16T11:44:00.002-04:00

I've known Vince for 26 years. I introduced he and his wife 26 years ago. Vince called this weekend out of the blue. We talked for nearly 2 hours. Kids, life, running, he now loves country music, jobs and old friends were some of the topics covered.

He asked how working with former POI was going. I said it has its ups and downs. I started working for her when we were a couple and I felt like we were real partners personally and professionally. I liked it! The dynamic has change dramatically since the break up and even further with the new guy in her life. Our partnership personally is gone and professionally strained at times. As I was told recently I work for her. No calls or emails to talk about anything other than the sphere of my job. I haven't let down my commitment to the company a single day through this. I have been as loyal as anyone could be. I believe in POI and the company and It's my professional goal to make this company as successful as I can. I do wish POI saw that and could even translate it to my loyalty to he personally, which has never wavered. The hardest part has been sitting in a meeting with POI and others and looking at POI knowing she's with someone else now. Yesterday seeing a face to a name helped a lot. The mystery is gone. I don't have to imagine what this super hero looks like. In fact he's... that doesn't matter. I told Vince that I do feel oddly emboldened by seeing a face to a name and that I can make this professional relationship work. It's a commitment I'm making for myself and for the company.

All that being said I told Vince that she is a drug and I am addicted. Even after 7 months of rehab I'm not cured. I love her today as much as I did 5 years ago. My love for her children never stopped. And I would go back in a second. But there is nothing I can do about it. Nothing at all and I don't have any expectations that she would ever come back. I told him in my reality or fantasy we'll be together again soon. The real reality is that it isn't her reality. Vince being the kind of guy that he is told me to call POI today to lay out my heart and if nothing happens nothing is lost. I told him I've done that many times. There's nothing left on my sleeve, there's nothing left in my heart that I haven't said and I frankly I can't take the rejection again. That he understood.

Alright that topic is over and hopefully will not be revisited again...unless there's a change but don't hold your breath.

facebook

2011-05-15T19:45:00.002-04:00

When you request to "friend" someone and they don't respond but don't deny, their posts make it to your homepage once in a while. The requested friend doesn't necessarily know that their posts are being seen the the requester. I of course was friends with my former Person Of Interest but when we broke up I "unfriended" not wanting to see her posts. Then some time past and I sent her a "friend" request, which was never accepted or denied. That being said I didn't mind seeing the occasional post by POI. Today that all changed. She posted that she was now friends with her new boy. My heart sunk. I knew his first name and today his last.

I closed the page immediately. The end of this/that relationship has been like a slow drip. Little by little my family has gone away and now there's a full name to my replacement.

I opened facebook again. I needed to now put a face to the name of POI's new man. Now I know. My feelings have nothing to do with him. I'm sure he's a really great guy or she wouldn't be with him but honestly, not what I would have expected. Maybe a bit more closure came from this.

I searched and found how to cancel the friend request, which I did.

Runslikeagirl

2011-05-08T13:11:00.002-04:00

Wednesday was Denise. Great profile, has run 4 marathons including one in NYC and great wit. Night started with Denise getting lost.Though she had my number she didn't call until I emailed her. She had given up finding my place. But was ready to try it again. We met at the Bridge Brew Pub. It was clear that she had used an older photo for her profile. Strike one. She does have a healthy sense of humor and is in great shape. Plus one. Conversation came around to what we do and she raged on my company and the concept. Not a good first date move. Strike two. After I regrouped the conversation went well. We then went to my house, I told her I had made cookies and she wanted to try one. So we retreated to c6. Cookies were tasty as per usual and she kisses really well. Plus two. On the way to her car I asked if her two kids lived with her, she said her husband has sole custody. WHAT! In America a husband got full custody of 2 children? I didn't ask how that happened. I didn't want to hear the answer. Because of the custody issue my sister's advice was to turn and run that this was too big a red flag to pursue. She's probably right. But she was a really good kisser....

It's my Mom's Birthday. She's checking in at 78 today.

2011-04-25T22:06:00.006-04:00

I called my mom this morning to congratulate her for making it this far. I'm not sure she knew it was me. My mom is the original good one. It's a very exclusive club. If you have such character and honor you may be deemed "one of the good ones". It isn't easily given but it can be quickly taken away. This isn't an issue because the good ones have a strong soul and spirit. This bestowment can be earned by small adults as well. Only two small humans have had the honor.

Back to my mom. A few back in the day snaps to celebrate my mom's Birthday.

Easter Sunday

2011-04-24T09:28:00.003-04:00

One of the down sides to being single at this moment in time, is today. I always loved Easter. Growing up it was new Easter clothes, egg hunts, Easter Baskets and Easter Dinner. The past few years I've loved watching kids look forward to the same things. The past few years I've loved watching kids Easter morning look for their baskets their mom hid the night before. Then digging through the baskets to discover the great things their mother gave such great thought to.

It's very difficult knowing someone else is living that memory today. It's very difficult knowing that someone else was chosen to live all the new memories. The biggest challenge in c6 is starting to create my own new memories and move some of those old memories out. That will be an on going project.

Today I have no plans. I did go to mass this morning. In my world of no expectations I haven't been disappointed today. That's not honest but it's the front I'm going with these days. There was talk of brunch but those plans fell through a few minutes ago. Going to church this morning was something I wanted or need to do and because I needed to at least feel the spirit of Easter if I wasn't going to share Easter with anyone today.

This is why I wake up every day

2011-04-22T17:33:00.002-04:00

Learning something new everyday is alone worth getting out of bed. My brother was driving through Raleighwood today on his way to Jacksonville, NC to see his daughter and stopped for lunch. His lovah made the trip as well. I learned at lunch today that I use too many words when communicating with women. For example to me "yes, I'll be there, I have to..." means yes, I'll be there. According to Lovah,"yes,, I'll be there, I have to,,," does not mean that I'll be there it means a conformation needs to be re-established prior to the previously
re-established time. And what I should have said was simply "yes I'll be there". I can neither confirm or deny the validity of this advice but the way my mind works it will go through an exhaustive vetting.

Reason number 2 for getting up today, my horoscope "Have faith that the worst is behind you, because it is. The future is very bright". I put zero faith or belief in horoscopes unless they're as stellar as today's.

Who wouldn't google someone before they went out?

2011-04-22T12:15:00.002-04:00

I'm not sure if I require therapy or if searching a person on Google is normal. It's kind of a passive way of stalking. Or maybe it's smart? Who knows?

With a name you can find their Facebook page, Linkedin profile, photos on Flickr, any road races they've run, Twitter page, professional or athletic organizations they may belong to, if they write a blog, phone number, home address and where they work. There isn't any real reason for this post just thinking out loud.

Date 1 | Bohemian59

2011-04-22T09:15:00.002-04:00

In my profile I end by saying "having completed a marathon gets you into the bonus round". It's a hold over line from my last Match experience. Well Bohemian59 wrote saying she made it to the bonus round. She has run in several marathons and 1/2s. After a couple of emails back and forth it was time to get this dating party started. Aesthetically speaking my expectations were low but I decided to go ahead and ask her out.

I met Sherry at Vavace (her choice) for an adult beverage. On paper we have a lot in common. So we meet and my first impression was that my aesthetic expectations were met. She was nice and the conversation was easy. There wasn't any chemistry so there isn't a need to go out again. But I'm glad I went.
__________________________________________________________

I've received a few emails from women in Wake Forest. Right now I can't even pretend to be interested even though 2 were of exceptional quality. Maybe I can put in a rider in my profile saying if you live in Haritage please move along, there's nothing to see here.
__________________________________________________________

Next up is Vickievale7 who recently moved to Raleigh from NYC-of all places. She went to Duke and got an MBA from UNC. Stay tuned...

New situations create new realities...

2011-04-03T12:39:00.005-04:00

After being with the love of my life for nearly 5 years a breakup caused my reality to change in a dramatic fashion. I lost a truly great family and the regrets will last a life time I'm afraid. Now 5 months later I face a new reality, dating again. Working alone, I don't get a lot of traffic here in c6 so the talent pool of single women is fairly shallow. Now for the third time I'm back on Match. It's hardly my choice but I need to start living again. I had great success the last time so here I am again, this time as a SWM 52 in search of...

I bought the one month plan for a test drive. This is day 3. I've received 4 emails and two winks or pokes or nudges. Here again a new reality has surfaced, the 4 kind women that emailed all look like my aunt, and not in a good way. They took the time to write and some of the things they said were very flattering. I should really send a response but what? Is a "it's not you it's me" form letter in bad taste? I'm sure I'll be on the receiving end of a few "what are you high?" kind of responses but we're not talking about how I'm received.

I certainly don't like having to be in the position to be on Match but the reality is I have to start living again and all the hoping, praying, wishing and nudging hasn't made any difference so here we are with my new reality. Let the living begin.

A few more, just because.

2009-11-05T20:12:00.022-05:00

Randon Snaps

2009-11-05T18:36:00.025-05:00

A few July 16, 2009 Predictions

2009-07-16T08:42:00.005-04:00

.Charles and Catherine will soon announce a baby is on the way. (Lori called this one at Taryn's birthday party)
.Right Time Kids will finally hit it's stride with new franchises and financial backing to expand corporate centers.
.Detroit Tigers will win the AL Central.
.Michigan Wolverines will win 6 games this season. RR will resign.
.Kim and Ethan will have a happy healthy baby boy.
.Chris will finally see WOW as the time suck that it is and will fully rejoin humanity.
.The worst is over for the economy but recovery will take 2 years.
.Lori and her sister will reunite in Raleigh.
.We'll all have a drama free rest of 2009.

Fifth Thursday of the year

2009-01-29T20:29:00.005-05:00

Today was the first annual Hand On Your Forehead day at Helios. The crowd was smaller then organizers had hoped for. Virginia Beach's own Chris Engel went with his signature Single Hand, Finger Tip method, which won him the Aleve European Championship last year in Gdansk Poland. Pesky Noitall, seen here next to Chris stole the show with the Two Handed 7 Finger Touch, which is big in Japan. Unfortunately Chris was later disqualified when he was found to have a banned substance on his fingers that was identified as Elmer's Glue, a known stickieant. Noticeably absent from today's event was Kim (nobody puts baby in the corner) Nilsen who failed to respond to the bell.

2009 Predictions

2009-01-06T19:52:00.002-05:00

1-Boys are back in style. Dan and Scotty will finally have another male in the house. Kim and Ethan will have a beautiful girl

2- Chris will get sucked back into the pharma world. At least one toe will remain in the photography pool.

3- Michigan Football will win at least 7 games.

4-Taryn will find a great deal of satisfaction and pride with her next job..

5-Right Time Kids will end the year with 12 or more new franchises.

6-Charles and Catherine will announce their impending parental re-up.

7-Marriage rate will increase.

8-Violent crime will decrease.

9-Grocery Store stock would be a good place for investing.

10-The first of two channels with 24 hour Reality Programing (RealiTV) will start.

11-Professional Services like legal, accounting, dental and therapy become more of a commodity as people are forced to look at every expenditure.

12-This is my last year in c6.

13-Dent will be retired-with honors of course.

14-Kim Teresa and Amy will give birth to healthy children who are all a little above average.

15-With Chris and Taryn's economic situation back on solid footing, they announce they're expecting.

16-At least 2 people will be in the lottery and run in NY.

17-I will be more a friend this year.

18-I will make at least 3 trips to Michigan.

19-I will run in a 5K 10K 10 miler a half marathon and whole marathon.

20-Paul and Ann are going surgery and illness free this year.

21-Will continues doing well.

22-Lori and Kristin become closer.

23-Everyone I know has a healthy happy and prosperous 2009 with lots of laughter.

Coffee Head

2009-01-04T12:39:00.003-05:00

Kleinstack and I went to one of the best parties in sometime, last night. We didn't get home until after 1:00. Crazy. Festivities were facilitated by the Harris'. Lori was on fire. Raleigh's photographic community was well represented.

This has been a nice Holiday season. Christmas was spent with te Kleinstacks. The I spent a few days in Michigan before returning to Raleight for New Year's Eve which was spent watching movies. LAst night's party was the biggest blowout of the Holidays.

Tomorrow reality creeps back into everyone's lives and work resumes. I guess I'm ready. It's going to be a busy week. Right off the bat I'm going to Miami on the 8th for a Franchise Expo thingy. There are about 3 prospects that may move within the next 2 weeks. That would be oh so cool. Kyle has a 2 day shoot in Atlanta and an eblast featuring Symon Bruty will go out this week.

I love food, however...

2008-11-30T22:29:00.002-05:00

...my gastrointestinal capacity was tested over the past few days. Too Much by Dave Matthews Band kept running through my head. I'm so glad there's a tomorrow so that I can get back to running and get back to normal.

Ok, but just one more.

2008-11-20T22:01:00.003-05:00

Today's big question: Finding underwear on the floor

2008-11-18T13:29:00.003-05:00

What the heck has happened to November?

2008-11-17T22:33:00.003-05:00

It's already November 17th.

Raven and I were playing around with Photo Booth earlier tonight and she went a little nuts as seen here. The Kleinstack had to put down Zoe today. She had several ailments that were beyond repair. Her quality of life wasn't very good the past few weeks. A few rounds with Photo Booth was a nice escape.

The election was a few weeks ago and as mentioned in my '08 predictions earlier this year our nation has elected it's first black President. Cool stuff my friend. Another of my predictions that has come to fruition is Green going mainstream. If you aren't green then you don't love apple pie or mama.

This month's fad is Facebook. The biggest draw to Facebook in my opinion is all the people that come out of the woodwork to check in. People I haven't thought about in years have appeared on my Facebook door step.

A couple of self portraits

2008-10-27T16:03:00.002-04:00

The NYC Marathon is Sunday. I'll be driving up with the Kleinstacks Saturday. Dan has broken his silence and has committed to running. I just confirmed things with Mr. Potter. The trip isn't going to be the same this year without Kim Taryn and Chris. Mr. Potter will only be there long enough to greet us before he heads back to the farm. So it will be just Dan and I staying at
111 E. 85th Street #F9. The Kleinstacks will be staying at Lori's aunt's spare apartment.

I voted today. I've never voted early before but I'll be at the Martins Tuesday. Because I have voted already, I wish there was a way you could program your radio and TV so you don't have to hear or see anymore political ads.

Fun with Photo Booth

2008-09-29T21:35:00.001-04:00

I've been playing with my snazzy new computer and found Photo Booth. It's like your own private photo booth, crazy.

Recent thoughts:

Poole's was a great time but it might not make it into the rotation.

Humble Pie is great as usual.

I'm glad fall has arrived.

Michigan beat Wisconsin.

I'm looking forward to my trip to Michigan this weekend. Kleinstack is also making the trip. Wedding and Abigail's baptism are on the social docket.

Did I leave the iron on?

I officially became part of the (CHLC) coffee house laptop crowd today. I met Chris and Lori for coffee at Helios. I don't feel different but I don't feel as pure.

Area Man Reads At A Third Grade Level

2008-09-24T22:04:00.002-04:00

Today I read to Raven's 3rd grade class. I went with Skippyjon Jones and Mummy Trouble. It's a personal favorite of Miss Raven. She prefers that I read Skippyjon's parts with a Spanish accent. It does add a bit of texture. I gotta be honest, my Spanish accent isn't that great.

I had a big day on the technology front. I transfered all the junk from my iMac to my brand new Macbook Pro. Nothing could prepare you for the new heights of technological prowess here in c6. This was a birthday gift from the Kleinstacks.

This past Saturday was the first day of my next 50 years. Finche's, Pooles and Humble Pie were the stops Saturday celebrating my day. I couldn't lose Kim Chris and Lori. A quality group of great people were in attendance. It was a great day.

It's cold tonight. I am so glad fall has finally arrived. Lori and I are going to a wedding in Michigan next weekend. Hopefully the leaves will be in full fall colors there.

Thoughts on the conventions

2008-09-02T20:19:00.003-04:00

Presidential Election: The difference between watching the opening ceremonies last week's Democratic Convention and tonight with the Republican Convention is like watching a football game V. watching the food line at K&W. I was watching the GOP party tonight and apparently only AARP members were invited. Only one black guy made it. This years choice isn't like the old adage of picking between the lesser of two evils. These are two solid candidates, two good people but the spirit of the two is vastly different both of the individuals but also of their campaigns. The recent window dressing by McCain isn't going to change that.

Sometimes you can send a boy to do a mans job

2008-08-13T19:42:00.002-04:00

Topher felt the need to build and he wasn't going to wait to be told what or how. That's my boy. He could have used saw ponys rather then saw horses.

I didn't think I would get into the Olympics this year but I'm hooked. The University of Michigan is single handedly dominating the Men's swimming competition. Michael Phelps, Peter Vanderkaay and Scott Spann are breaking world records and taking home the hardware.

Have you seen the women's beach volleyball uniforms? I have a real appreciation for the sport. Not only do the women have to play volleyball but they also have to navigate keeping their uniforms on. It's a good look.

Yellow Laundry

2008-07-23T23:13:00.003-04:00

I've always admired farmers and truckers. Farmers have to deal with planting, weather, locusts infestations and harvesting. Crops don't care if it's the 4th of July, farmers still have to do their farming. Same thing with truckers. They still haul their load on weekends, at night and during holidays. People need their stuff and they want it now. For the most part the only way it gets there is by truck. There are other professions like those in the serve and protect industry that fit this admiration but they get most of the attention. Not many kids growing up say that they want to be a trucker or farmer. So this photograph is my omage to the farmers and truckers of the world.

I had lunch with Kim, Catherine and Rebecca yesterday. It was Rebecca's 5th week birthday. We celebrated at Cameron Bar & Grill. Catherine is looking great. I hadn't seen her since before she had Rebecca and it was my first Rebecca sighting. I have to see Charles as a father. That should be interesting.

The Kleinstacks and I are heading north this weekend. Lori is running in a half marathon in NYC Sunday. Austin and Raven are going o be deposited in New Jersey and stay with aunt Grace. I was hoping to see Grand Master P while in NYC but he won't be in town-he may just be saying that.

Peace.

Random stuff

2008-07-15T20:34:00.002-04:00

Classic: Yesterday was Lori's birthday and part of the celebration included taking three bags of clothes to Goodwill. It wasn't taking the clothes that was memorable but rather the bags she put them in. Only Kleinstack would have Coach, Williams Sonoma and Nordstrom's bags to take clothes to Goodwill. I still love her.

Facebook: I recently posted my profile at the recommendation of a friend who said it might be good for professional contacts. After a few days my main question is, why do people I don't know want to be my friend? Who are these people? Is there a friend shortage out there that I wasn't aware of?

Politics: If Obama or McCain aren't doing it for you these days there is a fairly strong Independent guy worth looking at further, http://www.news3online.com/index.php?code=23qE145La693m89VuJxg

Pals: I haven't seen or heard from Charles and Catherine in some time. I've been a bit neglectful myself. That goes for Teresa and Scotty as well. My July 15th resolution is to reconnect with those fine people.

Karma: Do you lose Karma points if you say something less then kind about someone to people who don't know the person being commented on?

Oh Canada

2008-07-10T20:27:00.005-04:00

Having run the numbers and reviewed the tapes, I can only conclude that this was the best trip to Howe Island ever!

We have been making the pilgrimage to Howe Island since 1968. This year the Kleinstacks helped rock the island. It was their first trip to Pickett Lane. Imagine if you will, no TV, no video games, no news, no heat, no internet, only fishing boating, running, reading, biking and watching the boats sail past.

The Kleinstacks and I stayed next door at the Gordon's. They have a 3 bedroom apartment which could not have been any more perfect. The deck was an amazing epicenter of bliss. Drinking coffee while watching the boats, come on. I don't care who you are, that's cool. It was next door to where the Custacks and Kaufmans were staying so our commute was minimal.

Very little has changed on the island in 40 years, which is a huge part of the beauty. Aside from a few more cottages and the main ferry increasing capacity to 15 cars, the Kleinstacks saw the island as I did when I was 10 years old. I am so lucky to have shared my favorite spot on the planet with my favorite people on the planet.

If you can't get to Tuscany to write a book, Howe Island would be a great alternative.

Disintegration is the best album ever

2008-06-17T22:29:00.004-04:00

Kleinstack and I went to Charlotte to see The Cure yesterday. After U2, The Cure is my favorite band. I would have to say that Bobcat Arena is not a place to see a concert. The acoustics sucked. But Just Like Heaven, Close To You, Love Song, Pictures of You, In Between Days, Let's Go To Bed were covered. They played for over 3 hours and given the sound system I finally had to cry uncle after the first encore. That being said I still loved it and Kleinstack was a real trooper given that she only knows maybe 2 songs of theirs.

Along with the entertainment of the concert there was the entertainment of the audience. There was solid evidence that there's someone for everyone out there. Given the band, the crowd was going to be an assembly of Charlotte's finest characters. If Charles Darwin had a store, several of those people would have come from Darwin's Bargain Basement outlet.

We stayed at The Dunhill (Finished Mountain if you will). It was a perfect location, about 4 blocks from the arena. It was a nice hotel but our room was kind of warm and needed a little cosmetic attention.

The city of Charlotte was a buzz with construction. We were very impressed. It actually looks like a city. Lots of cool architecture and the downtown (or uptown) had a lot going on. I did wonder, if we were in Uptown where was Downtown or Midtown. It may just be a bit of Atlanta envy.

An Update from the Predictions desk at c6

2008-06-05T09:53:00.003-04:00

Five month review of 2008 Predictions

1) Half Right-Presidential Finalists Romney and Obama. McCain and Obama
3) Right-Stanley Cup Winner Detroit Red Wings
4) Right-Local office of AccessGLT will be awarded it's first job. Smurfit-Stone
5) Right- Chris will shoot his first commercial job and consider leaving Pharma. Out of pharma and concentrating on photography.
7) Wrong-New England wins the Super Bowl. New York Giants.
8) Wrong-Georges are having a boy. It's a girl-no name yet.
10) Wrong-Teresa and Scotty announce their return to Raleigh. Scotty's job and Teresa returning to school for her PhD will keep them in DC
15) Wrong-NBA Champions Detroit Pistons. Lost to Boston in the Eastern Finals
17) 20% Right-Kim, Chris, Lori, Dan and I will run the NYC Marathon. Only Dan got in.
18) Right-All things eco friendly will become mainstream. Everyday more and more is green from houses to cars and all points in between.

Next Prediction update will be November 5 after a new President is elected.

Today I voted and got a sticker

2008-05-06T23:08:00.002-04:00

Today was the primary. Pullen Art center was my spot to exercise my constitutional right. I love the idea of voting and everyone should. However the thing that make the experience somewhat of a buzz kill in the end are the propaganda vultures waiting to pounce on the way into the voting place. These people swoop in with their brochures, signs, buttons and cheers. They truly invade your space. I’ll I wanted to do was go in, do my business and leave, knowing I took part in this 232 year old ritual. Then when you're done voting you walk out and you find that the love is gone. They don't even look at you. They’re too busy hitting on the fresh meat. It's like a one night stand. I feel so used, but I voted.

Today in business it doesn't matter where you are...

2008-04-04T17:26:00.003-04:00

From the quiet confines of c6 and with the assistance from my AccessGLT people in SF,CA I submitted a bid to Xerox today worth $19,581,090. The bid is for ocean freight from China, Japan and Korea to their various U.S. facilities.
I have seen any numbers yet but this may be the largest bid today in the U.S. from a bedroom.

You know when you do something without thinking and it effects someone else negatively, and that person isn’t mad as much as they’re disappointed in the action. It’s much easier to deal with some getting mad. You can get over being mad. Disappointment is tough, there isn’t a do-over. You can back up but that has limited success. Even in the short term, saying you’re sorry doesn’t cut it. Thinking is hard and you have to do it all the time. Not thinking though can have many unforeseen consequences. Word of the day is, think.

What do you do if you run out of whitener?

2008-02-28T22:31:00.002-05:00

I guess I take where I live for granted but if you lived in some parts of Montana, even getting necessities like 1/2 and 1/2 require logistical decisions. There's no real point to that other then I'm out of whitener and I don't have a man servant. Even having associates doesn't help at 10:40 pm.

Monday was signup day for the NYC Marathon. Kim Chris and have signed up. I need to check on Dan to see if he's registered.
I'm considering running in a half marathon in April. I've already run in a 5k road race this year so I should be ready, right?

I should hear about the Boeing photo job tomorrow. It's my first $100k+ estimate in about 4 years. That would be huge not just for the money but for Robb's portfolio and maybe most importantly, morale. All fingers are crossed here in c6. I won't hear about the trucking bid for a few weeks. That one would also be big stuff, for money but again for morale.

I hope eveyone (all two of you who read this blog) has a fantastic March.

Random Stuff

2008-02-04T20:10:00.000-05:00

Central Washington State.

If you only saw the last 5 minutes of yesterday's Super Bowl then you saw the best 5 minutes of any Super Bowl.

Clichés that need to go away:
At the end of the day.
It is, what it is.
The Next Level.
And what not.

My prediction list isn't looking as fortuitous as I had hoped. Two predictions have already gone south on me; Charles and Catherine are having a girl and not a boy and New England didn't win the Super Bowl.

House is my favorite show.

Recently downloaded songs:
A Certain Romance-Arctic Monkeys
#1 Crush-Garbage
Rainy Season-Howard Devoto
Flying High-Jem
My Worst Enemy-Lit
Nothing Natural-Lush
Right Now-Mark Knopfler and Emmylou Harris
Heaven-Rolling Stones
Phantom Limb-The Shins
Disarm-Smashing Pumpkins
Shut Your Eyes-Snow Patrol
Incinerate-Sonic Youth

I love me some POI

Abigail, the wife of David and the Mother of Daniel

2008-01-24T20:34:00.000-05:00

Abigail Katherine Custack is scheduled to join the human race tomorrow at 7:30am. Amy is going in for a C Section due in part to the complications she had with Marin. I asked Dan if they could incorporate my name into Abigail's name and he said he'd see what he could do. Then I looked up her name on my source for everything Wikipedia, and found the connection, though way unintended. I'll still take it. Then there was the further connection to Dan. Too crazy.
Possible nick names are Abkat, AbiKathy, Abstack. As long as no one calls her Gail. You can't call a new born Gail.

If you have a pulse you may have symptoms of...

2008-01-16T16:16:00.000-05:00

Disease dejour, headache for sure.
How do we find the right prescription?
Where do we find the cure?
You may have ___ and not even know it.
If you have an erection lasting more then fours hours see your doctor
What are your symptoms?
Side effects may include nausea, constipation, dizziness, impotence and dry mouth.
Tell your doctor if you've been experiencing...
Don't take if you're pregnant, have a history of liver disease
Ask Your doctor
Could be a sign of a worsening condition

There was a time when advertising prescription medication was banned from television. When the ban was lifted they were relegated to mainly Sunday morning news programs but now they've proliferated print TV and radio.
Some of these advertised drugs have proven to be more dangerous then the symptoms they're designed to treat. Avandia Zelnorm and Vioxx have caused congestive heart failure and strokes in some patients. My favorite side effect can be found in Mirapex, which treats Restless Leg Syndrome (who the fuck came up with this one?), it may cause an increase in gambling. Seriously. They mention it in their ads.

I don't really have a point with all this, other then to ask or wonder how we ever got along without all these medications treating every conceivable human condition? I must be reaching the curmudgeon stage of life. What would the drug to treat that be called? Someone somewhere is working on itnow I'm sure.

23 Predictions for 2008

2008-01-02T17:18:00.000-05:00

1 Presidential finalists-Romney and Obama.
2 US will elect their first black President.
3 Stanly Cup Winner-Detroit Red Wings.
4 The local office of AccessGLT will be awarded the first of many transportation jobs.
5 Chris will shoot his first commercial job and consider leaving the pharmaceutical industry.
6 Taryn will graduate from college and become a US Citizen.
7 Super Bowl Winner-New England.
8 The Georges will have a Boy.
9 Kim and Ethan will announce that they are pregnant.
10 Teresa and Scotty will announce that they are returning to Raleigh.
11 Led Zeppelin will tour the US including a stop in Charlotte.
12 Custack and Associates will reclaim the success of it's glory years.
13 Advertising trend towards youth will be reversed as people get tired of those whiny entitled bastards.
14 Summer temps will be more reasonable.
15 NBA Champions-Detroit Pistons.
16 Lori will crusade an effort to get high school grads to forgo college for two years to perform community service domestically and internationally.
17 Kim, Chris, Lori, Dan and I will run the NYC Marathon.
18 All things eco friendly will become mainstream leaving NPR listeners scrambling for a new cause.
19 Gas prices will reach $4.00/gallon and no one will bark about it.
20 With more reality shows TV will sink further on people's "to do" list.
21 Stock in companies that deal with obesity and problems of aging will be a great place to put your money.
22 World Series Winner-Detroit Tigers.
23 Everyone I know will have a wonderful, prosperous and fulfilling 2008.

My people

2007-12-17T20:39:00.000-05:00

The Kleinstacks are going to join me in Michigan over the Holidays. It's going to be an all star event this year which will include my cousins Anne and Tim from CA and my brother Matt also from CA. I haven't seen Anne or Tim in a whole gob of years. I'm not sure the Kleinstacks are going to be ready for the cold. They'll be staying with my sister in Ann Arbor where 12 inches of snow fell yesterday. It'll be fun. I'm so glad I'm not driving this year. Chris and Taryn are going to look after Clio. That right there is a gift, otherwise I'd have to leave out a hundred bowls of food.

I hope everyone has a most wonderful holiday season and a safe, healthy, prosperous and adventurous 2008 with lots of love and respect and without drama.

peace.

I can transmit my thoughts to store front windows

2007-12-03T20:24:00.000-05:00

Charlie Brown Chrismas is on tonight. Christmas Season can now begin.

Since our last episode there's been a transition with POI. She has advance to POEI (person of extream interest), a position sought by many, obtained by few. Things all changed in New York during the Marathon weekend. Since then things had been crazy fun and really nice, very ahhh like. I've shared all the drama with my friends and I know they need a rest. I can't promise anything but one of my early New Years resolutions for 2008 is to be drama free. Dare to dream.

4:59.26

2007-11-07T18:28:00.000-05:00

Dan and I approching Chris and Kim between miles 12 and 13 in Brooklyn.

This past weekend was the marathon. I'm not sure if anyone is keeping score but that was maybe the best weekend of the year. For the fifth straight year the weather was great as was just about everything else. As if that weren't enough the Kleinstacks drove up to join in the festivities. John Potter was a great host.

Kim and Chris met us between miles 12 and 13, again around mile 23. The Kleinstacks met us around mile 18. Then they all met us after the jog and death march getting out of the coral.

For the sense of having thousands of people yell out encouragement along the way many runners write their name on their number. So people will yell GO... One guy put Nads on his number so people yelled GO Nads! I was thinking about it and next year I may put as my name ...speed racer-go or even better ...home; Go "Speed Racer-go" or Go "Home". Go home is kind of sadistic but funny.

There's already rumors floating around that Kim, POI and even Teresa are going to register for next year. That would crazy fun.

10 Days until the Marathon

2007-10-25T19:37:00.000-04:00

My long runs are done. No more 2 hour + runs. The hardest part is behind me, well a side from the 26.2 miles coming up.
The final line-up for the trip includes Dan, Chris Kim and myself. Mr. Potter will again play host.
Before I do that I'm going to Miami on Sunday for the annual national minority business conference. Not really being a certified minority, I get to be one for a day. This is huge event professionally for me so cross your fingers, legs, eye and Ts for me. A prayer would be nice as well.

I've been downloading some new or new to me songs of late. Ane Brun, The Stylistics, Euphoria, Gladys Knight and The Pipps, Garbage, Foo Fighters, Patsy Cline, Regina Spektor, Notorious B.I.G, Noir Desir, Righteous Brothers, The Rolling Stones, Wire, Sheila Chandra and Snow Patrol have joined my library.

For those of you keeping score at home, there isn't anything new on the POI front. At times our relationship reminds me of the old Charter ads, "if you don't get help at Charter, please get help somewhere". POI is my bestest friend, we are each other's biggest supporters and we make each other laugh. I know there's more to a normal relationship but I really dig her chilli and she's cool:)

Today's ethical question is, what if you have a friend who does something that is socially and morally unethical? I guess you could ask, how unethical? Can you maintain a friendship? Do you cut them off? Do you stand by them? For some offensives the answer is clear but what if it’s not so clear? I don't have answers I just have questions.

Everyday is a life lesson

2007-10-12T19:05:00.000-04:00

I recently spent a week in Michigan watching my sister's kids while she and my brother in-law went to Italy. Usually I take my own toiletries but this time I forgot my beauty products which is limited to facial and body lotions. I was left with my sister's selection, apparently Matt in a minimalist in the lotion arena. After a run on my second day in Ann Arbor I tool a shower and afterwards I moved onto the lotion potion of the program. I didn't have my glasses so I couldn't read all the choices in front of me so I had to guess what might be appropriate for my face and body. I stood there for a minute and just dove in. With all the choices I knew I couldn't really make a bad decision after all aren't they all the same? But without my glasses it was a bit of a crap shoot. Anyway mission accomplished and I felt clean and well lubricated against the elements.

Shower number two was easier, I just stuck with the same line-up. The first round of my lotion selection seemed to do the trick besides I didn't think it was necessary to think too much again. I was still though wondering what the heck I was putting on my body.

Like my old pal POI showers don't have to be taken everyday or even every few days but I went ahead and took another shower a couple of days later whether I needed it or not. This time armed with my glasses I decided to read what I was putting on. It was for the most part all in French. I took French in 8th grade but as more then a few people have told me, my French is gibberish. Light Blue by Dolce + Gabbana; a refreshing body gel, I used for my body lotion. Seemed like a reasonable choice. L'eau D'Issey Douceurde Crème Pour LeCorps by Issey Miyake, I used for my face. I have absolutely no idea what that was. Lastly I used Tonique Magique: Apaisant Sans Alcool by Dior, for my feet. This is where I made my big mistake. Upon reading further Tonique Magique is "the last step in a make-up removal beauty routine. i don't use a lot of make-up on my feet.

So today's life lesson is to read labels before using them. My feet did feel nice and smooth afterwards so maybe products for make-up removal can also help your feet.

Let's try this again...

2007-10-07T19:05:00.000-04:00

After a couple of attempts at reconciling things with POI, today was our final conversation. The fact that POI doesn't see me in her life long term finally sunk in. To know the kind of relationship we had on the deepest level, it remains difficult to comprehend how or why it's over but not seeing me long term in her life is a tough obstacle to overcome. She's one in 1.8 million. I couldn't love, respect or adore anyone more then I do/did her. She was truly my "it" girl. I will miss she and her children and all that they brought me for a very long time. I certainly pled my case with her and nothing would please me more then for her to see that what we had was rare and that that wins the day but she's not going to change which means I have to move on. If I had 3 wishes I would use one of them here and POI and I would continue the magic. But I can't wait and wish. I'm going to give Match another go, it's where I met POI and maybe lightening will strike twice. This may be a fruitless venture sense I would be looking for POI sans all the thinking. I get the hebbies just thinking about anyone else even touching POI. YUCK!

So one person walks out of my life and another one re-enters. I spent 2 hours of my day today, that I should have spent in WK, having coffee and talking with Kyle Hood (kylehood.com) a photographer I repped back in the glory days of my repping career. We parted on not so good terms and frankly I was surprised to hear from him. I was his best man at his wedding 9 years ago. After his apologies and my accepting of those apologies we talked about working together again. He's a good guy and he does take some pretty pictures so I think I'm going to do it. I have to talk to my web designer to see what it would take to add him to my sight and retain the clean design that it presently has.

Tomorrow's topic is my week last week in Michigan taking care of my sister's children...

One person leaves another re-enters.

2007-10-07T19:02:00.000-04:00

Have I mentioned, don't take anything or anyone for granted?

2007-09-19T21:49:00.000-04:00

I guess this is the obituary to an at times magical relationship. One day you can be in a euphoric blissful state and less then a week later you can diminished to stuff in a box ready to be dropped off. Though the actual words were not spoken POI broke up with me today after 20 months together. It's not a very good birthday present, in fact it so sucks. I'm pissed and very disappointed. I frankly am a bit stunned by this decision. Aside from that, I really don't have anything negative to say about her other then that this isn't her best decision. I loved POI more then I thought would have been possible by any one human. She's stunning and honestly one of the highest quality people I've ever been around. POI's house is a house full of laughter and love and I was a part of that, which ment so so much. The at times magical moments we had is in such contrast to today. I feel empty. I feel like my best friend died today. POI and I aren't the only ones affected by this, A+R who I love as my own are going to miss me. I miss them already. Not having kids they were a new experience for me. They are truly great kids and POI is a good mother. It was a fun foursome. I grew in may ways during these 20 months and for that I am extremely grateful. If I had three wishes, I would use one of them here. Maybe I do, how long does it take for wishes to kick in?

120 minute run...

2007-09-08T16:59:00.001-04:00

..and I did it in 2 hours.

Central Park 11/03

Last night I got the official hand off of Chris' number for NY. This is the second time I'll be running as Chris Engel. When I run as Chris I like to take on all of his mannerisms and his persona. Crazy fun. There's talk that Kim may jump in with Dan and I. The usual jump in spot is around mile 12 in Brooklyn. Right now the line-up for the trip are Kim Chris, Dan and myself, staying at Mr. Potter's. The Georges may come up as well but would stay in a near by hotel.

I had to turn off the Michigan game. They were getting blown out again. ARGH!!!

You know when you get really pissed off...

2007-09-02T22:13:00.000-04:00

and no one seems to understand?

The Michigan game was the sourse of my pissed offness. There wan't even a line on that game. Michgan was #5 in the nation. They had never losed to a 1A school in their 115 year history of playing football. Well this past Saturday was the day when the universe was upside down. I was in Va Beach this weekend with the Kleinstacks, I checked in on the game on line when it was 28-17. I wasn’t happy but there was the second half and I knew Lloyd Carr would get their heads back on straight for the 3rd quarter. POI, was having a hard time getting her head around my pissed offness. I was a mess when I checked back in after the game. The season was over. There was no reason to watch another game. I can't read Sunday's paper. I can't watch any sports for days. This was the biggest upset in the history of college football. As my boy Chuch D put it " don't believe the hype". I said it last year and I’ll say it again, Lloyd should be fired. If he was in the private sector he would at the very least be on probation. His record notwithstanding. If Michigan doesn’t beat Ohio State this year he joins former OSU coach John Cooper in retirement.

Today POI asked if I was ok to watch football again. I told her it might be a few days before I can even read the paper. I’ll probably end up watching the Oregon game but right now I’m not interested. I just don’t want to hear more about that thing Saturday.

I feel better thank you for reading. Michigan still sucked.

Self Portrait

2007-08-13T17:41:00.000-04:00

Aunt Mary died last Wednesday. She lived a good life and the memories cushion her lose. Though she had been ill for some time it was never the subject of any conversation. Not that I didn't want to hear about it, she didn't want to talk about it. She felt our time together was to short to bring up how sick she was. She was more interested in hearing about "what was really going on". She always started out with " I have a second, tell me all you know". It was cute the first 237 times I heard it but then I would say it with her. She was a great listener but her also had strong opinions on almost every subject. We had a similar sense of humor which may be why I always thought she was funny.

It's a big day tomorrow here in c6. I have a conference call with Kodak tomorrow. It's sort of an introduction call to discuss transportation. I'll save my notes, I can feel the interest out there. My partner in such endevors Chris will be joining me. My brain isn't big enough to handle such a call right now.

My brain is much less cluttered these day. The light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter and bigger. Keep your fingers, eyes, legs and T's crossed.

You never know what kind of influence you have on others

2007-08-06T20:24:00.000-04:00

I just received news that my favorite aunt isn't likely to last another day. Aunt Mary's been breathing life into everything she's done and everyone she's been in contact with for the past 80 years. Growing up she was my favorite adult. She has such a full spirit. She has such a quick wit and an honest sense of humor and sincerity that always made you glad you were in her company. She taught me a lot about life and was a huge influence on me even on my move to Raleigh when I was 24. When ever I went back to Michigan going to see she and my uncle Alan was always a priority. I've been blessed to have such a wonderful human in my life. She is going to be missed by everyone who knew her. I've gone between has and had but she will always be in my heart. She is a great woman and I'll miss her horribly.

Dare to dream

2007-08-05T18:14:00.000-04:00

...the alternative is giving up. Many of my friends are daring to dream. Kim and Ethan, recently married, just moved into their new house, Chris is exploring a new career in photography, Taryn will be graduating from college in the next semester or two, Charles just started his first new job in several years, and Lori who has a successful business is seeing further growth with an extension to her business. Two years ago none of these good people could have guessed they would be where they are now. I'm the late bloomer in the group but things are changing in c6 as well. I've learned after several false starts not to tell everything I know so as change becomes tangible I'll share. But the dream is alive.

Is your gut the arbiter of your life?

2007-08-01T22:36:00.000-04:00

What part of your body makes the final decision? Your heart? Your head? Your gut? What happens when you have conflict between these various body parts? I know it's situational and different parts weigh in more depending on the situation. Buying cereal, buying a pair of shoes or staying with someone you love are different emotional decisions. Cereal, maybe not a life changing decision but even cereal can be an emotional decision though maybe on the lowest level. Your head may come into play here. Buying shoes ups the emotional anti. How will they look, do they match anything I have, how expensive are they, how will I feel wearing them? The head and heart play large rolls here. Now for the big one, if you love someone who brings you joy, laughter, happiness and shows you a side of yourself that you haven't felt in a long time yet your gut tells you that it isn't long term, what body part prevails? The heart tells you that you have found the right person. Your head may tell you that as great as it is more time may be needed to fully evaluate what the heart is telling you. What happens when you've found the love of your life but your gut tells you it won't last? What do you tell this person? What can you tell this person? Can you tell this person that they should follow their heart-it is the largest organ in the body so it should carry more weight. Happiness respect joy honesty and laughter is a hard combination to come by and to let it go because of a gut feeling seems like a decision a person would soon regret and the other person would have a difficult time understanding and emotionally accepting.

Chance of clouds today

2007-07-28T16:11:00.000-04:00

Can you imagine working so high in the air that you can't see the ground?

I'm going to see the Simpsons movie tonight. I've watched the Simpsons since they were on the Tracy Ullmun show back in da day so I'm not sure if the only difference will be a longer version of the show. I heard there was going to be some full frontal nudity.

An update from the last post, drama level has been lowered. Whinning has all but ceased. Things with POI are still at a crossroad but the map is getting easier to read. My pal Chris' company is hiring so he asked that I submit a resume. If all that weren't enough I submitted another estimate for AccessGLT (the transportation company I work for) this week. That's the second one in 2 weeks. Friday I received another RFP. If that continues and we actually get one or some of these bids all will be right with the world.

Sometimes an image matches your mood

2007-07-26T20:53:00.000-04:00

It's a hot July day here in Raleigh town, so a dark moody image of a late spring day in North Dakota seems like a good way to cool things off. Besides It fits the conflicted way I feel today. This is the first day of my blog. I have no idea where this is going to go if anywhere but I figure it's a good outlet.

I have a full head these days with money, my relationship with my POI-Person of Interest, and my sources of income. I've always tryed to keep drama at bay. Life is to darn short to add drama into the mix. However that seems to be where I am these days. With more friend getting married or remarried these days, things unsettled with my poi and living 744 miles from my family, it's kind of quiet here in c6. Things are to the point where I'm whining. That's not me. So I decided I needed an outlet and here it is my very own blog. If nothing else it can be a way to express my views and thoughts...do people ever read these things?