My Black friend

I've known Vince for 26 years. I introduced he and his wife 26 years ago. Vince called this weekend out of the blue. We talked for nearly 2 hours. Kids, life, running, he now loves country music, jobs and old friends were some of the topics covered.

He asked how working with former POI was going. I said it has its ups and downs. I started working for her when we were a couple and I felt like we were real partners personally and professionally. I liked it! The dynamic has change dramatically since the break up and even further with the new guy in her life. Our partnership personally is gone and professionally strained at times. As I was told recently I work for her. No calls or emails to talk about anything other than the sphere of my job. I haven't let down my commitment to the company a single day through this. I have been as loyal as anyone could be. I believe in POI and the company and It's my professional goal to make this company as successful as I can. I do wish POI saw that and could even translate it to my loyalty to he personally, which has never wavered. The hardest part has been sitting in a meeting with POI and others and looking at POI knowing she's with someone else now. Yesterday seeing a face to a name helped a lot. The mystery is gone. I don't have to imagine what this super hero looks like. In fact he's... that doesn't matter. I told Vince that I do feel oddly emboldened by seeing a face to a name and that I can make this professional relationship work. It's a commitment I'm making for myself and for the company.

All that being said I told Vince that she is a drug and I am addicted. Even after 7 months of rehab I'm not cured. I love her today as much as I did 5 years ago. My love for her children never stopped. And I would go back in a second. But there is nothing I can do about it. Nothing at all and I don't have any expectations that she would ever come back. I told him in my reality or fantasy we'll be together again soon. The real reality is that it isn't her reality. Vince being the kind of guy that he is told me to call POI today to lay out my heart and if nothing happens nothing is lost. I told him I've done that many times. There's nothing left on my sleeve, there's nothing left in my heart that I haven't said and I frankly I can't take the rejection again. That he understood.

Alright that topic is over and hopefully will not be revisited again...unless there's a change but don't hold your breath.